Saturday, May 21, 2011

Still I fight

Your a bastard
Son goes in for a hug
Boot into the stomach
He looks up
Tears in 2 year old eyes
Speaking with out words
I wish I could tell her to stop having kids
Yet she has another on the way
She despises him cause
He looks like his deadbeat dad
He is paying the missing  child support check
With bruises and a broken spirit
He will never heal from
Now he feels unwanted
He doesn't sleep at night
Not cause of the monsters under the bed
But the monster inside of his head
Somewhere a six year old boy
Is being tucked into his final resting place
His murderer is his mom
Yet we won't know that for three days
He spent his last week sick
Sore throat
He spent his last days
Not knowing he was on his way
To heaven
He had his life ahead of him
His mom took it away
She cries she just wants to die
I just wish he could of lived
He had the same birthday as me
Cue back in on knocked up mom
Sitting at the bottom of the stairs
Gash in her head
He said he wouldn't
Now she's in labor
3 months early
She and the baby
Won't make it through the night
Let alone make it out of ICU
Two doors down a baby
Fights for her life
Her daycare worker shoved
Soiled  baby wipes down her throat
He sits in jail
While mother fights to keep her eyes open
She doesn't want to miss anything
Her fingers clenched to the call button
Four blocks away
A baby is being rushed to the hospital
Crack addict mother drugged him
Threw him out the window
Neighbor catch him
Dialed 911 with shaky hands
Kept composed as she asked for help
Kept composed even though she wanted to strangle his mom
Police stand off two doors down
Crack addict bitch didn't make it
Shot 13 times
To many sudden movements
I sit and stare at the sky
Past scars sit there and haunt me
I have flash back and demons
That could fill endless numbers of notebooks
Houses I've  been thrown out of
A heart that never heals
Love misrepresented
Faith shattered by misrepresentation of jesus
I am still afraid of the dark, loud noise and confrontation
I have live behind these walls as a victim for 29 years
Yet I am alive
Very much and I can't sit here
Watching another child die
In the hands of someone they trust
I was neglected and abandoned
Thrown away and fought for my life
Yet I survived
They did not
So still I fight............


  1. OUCH LOVE/Bytch Slap of Reality the effects/affects of physical &mental abuse as well as neglect Break down of Delicate fibers A Poetic PSA Wake up Call & MESSAGE!MUCH LOVE & CONTINUAL BLESSINGS Jill

  2. ty so much jill. love and welcome <3

  3. wow! you are fierce and I mean that in a good way!

  4. thank you tarringo and welcome to my blogspot

  5. deep wrie love every word your expressed so wonderfully.

  6. Big thanks to all of you .much love